Striders cross the line in new record time

Well, that was easy. No sore calves, thighs, ankles or knees among the team that stormed home in the Belfast Marathon yesterday. Not even a blistered toe. And, above all, no no-shows at work today. We’re obviously a whole lot fitter than we thought.

(In fact, Brian is sorer than all our runners put together after traipsing the streets of Glasgow at the weekend.)

And to cap it all, a new record time set by Joanne, Bettina, Peter, Mark and Sam*. Well done, everyone – that pretty much sets the standard for Ross and Mark running the New York Marathon in November.

* 4 hours, 37 minutes. And still smiling. Well done!

Stirring words as we Stride to Victory

Those darned Hollywood scriptwriters have been nicking ideas from our Monday morning meetings again. How else do you explain this blatant series of rip-offs?

Still, it’s with words such as these that we send forth our gallant Elm House Striders to the melee that will be the Belfast Marathon on Monday.

Go forth, gang.

And run… run like the wind.

Right, get your wallets out for charity. Or we’ll be sending the boys around.

Friends, clients and couch potatoes – open your wallets and dig deep for a good cause.

Because next Monday, Elm House Striders will be pounding the streets of Belfast in the May Day Marathon.

That’s why we’re now going to hound you to cough up some much-needed spondulicks.

So, on reading this, I expect you to lift the phone and pledge a handsome donation to our autism charity.

If you don’t, we’ll send the Striders round to waggle their blistered toes and smelly trainers in your face until you surrender your cash. (And having smelled some of their ‘ordinary’ footwear, I imagine that is a fate worse than death.)

Our operators Michael and Bettina are now taking calls. So come on – do us proud: lift the phone and lend a hand.

And if you’re going to be viewing the marathon, please roar them on.

• Donate now or expect a visit from an angry, trainer-bearing Bettina, Joanne, Mark, Niall or Sam.

It’s a rock’n'roll charity life we lead

We had another superb night out recently when we rustled up two teams of quiz genius’ made up from Elm House employees and a few other stragglers who took part in Never Mind the Business at the Ramada – a music quiz in aid of Action for Children.

Well, at least one team was genius, finishing a credible third (three points behind the eventual winners – not that we’re bitter or anything).The other team, well they were just happy to be there it seems!

A great night was had by all with Michael proceeding to bid for everything that moved on the night and coming back to the House with – among other things – a rather cool limited edition, numbered vinyl of the Beatles’ White album and a rare Clash poster with photography taken at Carlisle Circus. Music was provided by Tizzy Lizzy – quite appropriate as St Phil’s mum Philomena Lynott was a guest – and the band certainly did her son proud!

An opportunity for Clash-related captions here:

The Magnificent Five? Somebody got Murdered? Rock the Ramada? Should we stay or should we go? Belfast calling?

I could go on… but I won’t.

Nameless old geezer in cowboy boots – the true spirit of Rock’n'Roll

This is spooky – takes me back to when I saw the real thing in Enniskillen’s Lakeland Forum in 19-and-ahem!

NI Cancer Fund for Children

Just to let you know of a worthy way to earn interest on your money – AND do a good turn at the same time. The Northern Bank Charity Saving Bond is donating loads of money to the Northern Ireland Cancer Fund for Children – we did the campaign that’s out at the moment. So do yourself and others a favour and pop some of your hard-earned into the account. But hurry, offer closes end of March.

Marathon Men

This place is full of marathon men and women at the moment. Some have their eyes set on New York. Others on Dublin. And many more on Belfast. There’s even talk of crazy half-marathons in Donegal and the BUPA run in the Phoenix Park. I have no idea how we’ve all become so health-conscious of late – we’ve even cut out the Pickled Onion Monster Munch crisps at lunchtime. However, just to warn all my co-Belfast Marathon relay runners, there may be a need to call someone off the sub’s bench if my knees keep creaking and popping the way they are at present.

* This isn’t us – but we’ll look just as silly in a few months’ time.

* I’ve got two of these. Neither one is working properly. Any suggestions?